Smackdown on prison cellphones? Not so fast

Not that this is any big shock to any of you, but no: I’ve never been in jail.

Let’s be real, a little blonde like me would have to organize some kind of mob-style bodyguard team in order to survive a prison sentence.

I always took solace, though, in knowing that if the baddies are locked up, they can’t get to me.

Until I became aware that, besides getting allotted pay phone time, prison inmates have been able to gain access to contraband cellphones in order to — among other things — plan attacks on victims both inside and outside of the jail compound.

And if that doesn’t make you lose sleep at night, perhaps nothing will.

Upon hearing that Global Tel*Link — who currently manages the pay phones in California’s 33 adult correctional facilities — was in talks with Gov. Jerry Brown about implementing a “‘risk-free” system that would filter out these rogue cellphone activity, I started to feel a little bit safer.

But that didn’t last long.

CaliforniaWatch reported this week that the California Council on Science and Technology released a study showing all the holes and flaws in this high-tech cell blocking plan.

For starters: This system doesn’t filter out 4G, WiFi, Skype, or text messages.

Doesn’t filter text messages?! Most of the people I know text over speaking on the phone!

Add to it: This “managed access technology” could interfere with cellphone signals and radio frequencies from urban areas near some prisons, putting public safety at risk.

Oh, and one more thing: This type of technology has been tested at a rural jail in Mississippi, and has already encountered “serious technical issues.”

This technology sound like it is one step away from pulling a SkyNet and creating Terminators.

Maybe Global Tel*Link should work out a couple dozen kinks before setting this technology loose on California’s correctional facilities.

And in the meantime, I’ll go recruit a couple of big bodyguards. Takers?