This Week In Orange: Game 1, duh

A little history lesson for you, Giants Nation.

Today is not only the two-year mark since the last time our San Francisco Giants entered a World Series. It’s also the anniversary of the birth of “This Week In Orange” and all its stat-loving, smack-talking, bar-promoting glory.

Every game of the 2010 championship series, my best friend Melanie and I — before we wore the tutus — sat at the Dubliner on West Portal to scream at whichever TV we ended up in front of that day.

The one thing more shocking than the number of free drinks that we received was the lack of knowledge about the home team from the guys who were buying them.

How could so many people be wearing Giants merchandise and not even know what was going on during the game? Or during the whole series!?

Heck, one guy thought Brian Wilson was a starting pitcher, and couldn’t name a single other player.

If I’m lyin’, I’m dyin’.

And so developed my distaste for fair-weather fans, and the need for bar buddies that can actually hold a conversation with this crazy-little sports writer.

So what better way to kick off Game 1 of the 2012 World Series but to slide up to the bar, order a beer and discuss those stats like no wishy-washy wannabe fan can:

Starting Pitchers: I’m not talking about our starting pitching either. We should all be well-versed in our pitchers by now.

The Tigres thrive on their starting pitching; it’s their bread and butter, not unlike how the Giants were in 2010.

However, you get past the starting rotation, and you have a shoddy defense and a reeeeeeeally weak bullpen. (Aside from Tweakerpants Valverde, who’s game-time rituals make Brian Wilson’s beard look clean-cut.)

If we can hit their starting pitchers with the force that we knocked St. Louis around with, we will be golden.

The Rest Factor: The fact that the Tigres had way too much time to rest should not be the focus of any discussion on whether or not they perform well.

. . . It is worth noting, however. If they look sluggish, it could be because they had too much time off.

Keeping Up The Team Contribution: My best friend will tell you, my favorite word as of late is “con-tri-bu-tionnn” — overly enunciated depending on how many drinks I’ve already had — because just about every guy has been an offensive force at least once during the NLCS.

As my man Hunter “Techno Viking” Pence said: “There’s a different hero every night.”

I’d like to see the team keep that up, wouldn’t you?

Game 1: So we are opening up the series with a left-handed pitcher on the mound against a team that doesn’t hit southpaws as well.

And we have the threat of rain and a team we’ve never faced before on the biggest platform that Major League Baseball has to offer.

Note to Gigantes: No pressure or anything.

You guys can hit me up on Facebook at “You Know You Bleed Orange & Black When. . .” or tweet at me via SFBay’s Twitter handle.

Other than that, you all had better be TV-side and semi-trashed by first pitch. Game 1 starts at 5:15 p.m. at AT&T Park.

The tutu has spoken.