Dear Lincecum haters: shut up

Dear Tim Lincecum haters,

First and foremost: Shut. Up.

That’s right. You heard me. Take a needle and thread and stitch those big, negativity-spewing mouths of yours shut.

Because No. 55 only allowed one run in five innings in a 6-1 victory over the Mets today.

Oh, and he had eight strikeouts. His command of the strike zone was delicious.

Oh, and he pitched that 2-seam fastball right down the pipe at over 90 miles per hour.

Boo-yah.

It’s unclear where any of you get off bashing on The Freak just a couple weeks into the season, claiming the 27-year-old right-hander is suddenly washed up because his velocity was down.

Now, as a true orange-and-black-bleeder with enough baseball knowledge, I’ll admit: My man Big Time Timmy Jim did not start 2012 on the right foot. No Giants fan was happy to see him giving up home runs in the season opener down in Arizona against the Diamondbacks.

However, I am so sick and tired of hearing critics and fair-weather fans play the “his velocity is down” card.

Hey haters, why don’t you lose 15-plus pounds during the off-season and keep your velocity up?

In today’s game, Lincecum not only clocked a handful of 92-mph fastballs, but he also lowered his ERA to 8.20.

His best? No, far from it. But it’s a heck of a lot better than being 12.91 like it was after his first two starts.

Now sure, having kick-ass offense in today’s game — Buster Posey’s HR in the first inning and Nate Schierholtz’ three-run shot in the third — never hurts. But Timmy will always pitch better when the rest of team is playing well.

So, do the Giants-loving community a favor, and stop trying to tell us that he’s in a serious, career-defining slump.

We’ll just remind you that, after Lincecum went into a slump in August 2010, he came back and won a World Series.

How about you win back-to-back Cy Youngs and get a World Series ring before you come down on our pitcher again.

Sincerely,

The Tutu-Sporting Duchess of The Freaky Franchise

P.S. GO GIANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!